I started my new job last week, and here's an amusing log of what it's been like...

Day 1:

• was not expected by anyone, since the HR guy had forgotten to tell anyone I was starting today, and he locked himself out of his office this morning so I couldn't call and find out where to show up (I guessed wrong, of course)
• changed projects/groups/bosses three times, without ever meeting the bosses in question
• free lunch
• rebuilt/rewired the AC adapter and jack for a laptop that someone had forgotten to unplug before walking out of their cube with it (I finally met the boss for the 3rd project: part-time WinNT system administration)
• snagged someone's machine to use for now, wiped out their stuff (oops) -- she came by later and looked very confused to see me at the computer, but didn't dispute the use of it
• discovered that the entire site is fed only by one ISDN line (I have that much net connectivity in my apartment, and here we have 50+ people using it together...)
• I don't have a phone, yet

  Day 2:

• got pulled into another group, again, by a manager who is way behind schedule and saw that none of my other managers were around to keep their claim on me
• snagged a computer which is now MINE, gave other, now partially dead, computer to sysadmin
• discovered that, apparently, I owned the only stapler in the building, found one extra feed of staples for it
• tracked down a pen and one pad of Post-Its from someone else's desk
• started learning Microsoft's Active Server Pages (ASP) web server stuff
• started learning Microsoft's Visual Basic Scripting language (VBScript)
• started learning Microsoft's Internet Information Server (IIS) (web server)
• I still don't have a phone

  Day 3:

• company meeting to explain the simple move routine (oh, did I mention our lease ran out on the current building, because we wanted to move to a bigger place anyway, and consolidate the three offices?)
• free lunch
• trying out lots of web stuff, wrote "Hello, World" web program
• I still don't have a phone

  Day 4:

• installed Win95 on the blown-up laptop, since someone had installed a beta of Win98 on it (BIG mistake...)
• learning more ASP, VBScript, and IIS
• packed all my great amount of stuff (the company stapler, the pad of Post-Its, my pen, and my pencil) for the move
• found the printer
• sysadmin reclaimed laptop :(
• I still don't have a phone

  Day 5:

• skipped work, since I had to leave for gaming by about 3:30 to make it across the Bay in time, and besides, they were moving everything by 3pm, anyway, so all the machines and such wouldn't be working

  Day 6 (Week 2):

• found my new cube -- sysadmin was in it, 'cuz he liked it, so he had swapped with me
• apparently I just had this stupid grin of "uh-huh. that's nice" on my face most of the day
• left after a couple of hours, since roommate, whom I had carpooled with, didn't have power or network working in his cube, courtesy of the move (they fit his and 7 other cubes into a small room which should only have held 5, or at most 6 cubes -- they all have 3/4 size cubes, with missing outer walls, so everyone is staring into everyone else's cubes, they blocked off one of the two exits, and had to rewire all the power stuff...)
• I still don't have a phone

  Day 7:

• am working on getting onto a project of my choice, refusing to acknowledge any claims over me until I have evaluated the options available
• met with a founder, who had apparently forgotten about a project he committed to several months ago, and had just realized that the customers were promised something for two weeks from today -- he has no team yet... I will probably be on this team, as it is the only one I have found which doesn't require me to program in C/C++ -- actually, it is probably going to use the "prohibited" Visual Basic in order to be done on time for rollout (for "beta" testing?!?) to over 5,000 people
• discovered a rebellion fomenting in the Bethesda office
• free lunch
• I am starting to carve out a small domain (future empire?) of my own through the chaos
• I still don't have a phone

The adventure continues tomorrow, as I supposedly get my first paycheck...

  Copyright © Bruce Caruthers